The Chicken has flown the coop

Last week a guy I used to call my friend hung himself. I was of course saddened to hear that had happened, but honestly I was not totally shocked. More shocked then when I heard that Hedberg had overdosed, but less saddened.

I am actually a little irritated. To kill yourself- it is just....well, chicken.

hey, which came first, the chicken, or Quitting?

He leaves behind a wife and children. I never met his kids, but his wife- who I met as his girlfriend- was a sweet person. Any girl who loves a comedian and is there for him and all the selfishness that we possess is unusually angelic in my opinion.

I met him early on in his stand up days. He was the second white guy to do well consistently at the Uptown Comedy Corner in Atlanta, so we heard one another's name very often. We would talk a lot on the phone about comedy and he would call complaining about how comics who couldn't follow him kept having his time cut, not allowing him to do some of his routines- whether it be musical bits, humping crowd members, props, or his closer where he pulled his pants off to reveal a wig-stuffed thong.

Chicken was a crazy, physical comedian who was fearless. He had a talent like few have seen. Lighting up rooms. The guy who would literally do anything for a laugh. He could do anything. Impressions, physical comedy, sing, dance, stage dive, and apparently tie a usable noose.

Why did the Chicken cross the road- to get to the rope.

Not many comedians respected him or liked him. I did. I pitched him to my agent- letting him know that he was doing to crowds something I had never seen before. He was crazy physical, once even broke his own nose on stage while humping a stool.

I remember standing up for him in conversations many times. "He is a selfish asshole who is fake and uses people" they would say. I would point out to them that I talked to him all the time and they just misunderstood. He was a good guy who just wanted to make people laugh and be great. He seems like a solid guy to me I would say.

Over and over I heard that for the first year or two that I knew him. It seemed like not one person had a good thing to say. There came a time down the road another year or so that I came to realize that everybody was right, and I told him so. It was part of our last conversation.

I talked to a few other comedians who knew him a little this week and after the initial shock and obvious sadness at knowing it happened, they all had similar things to say.

like:

"Chicken threw a huge glass of water on me one night when I was walking on stage. I glad that mutha fuckas dead."

Why did he do that?

"Cause he was a Dick. I guess I'm not glad he's dead, But it goes to show Karma is on my side. Throw water on me, live in unbearable emotional pain till you take your own life.LOL"

or:

"I remember a conversation where he was telling me about his sisters boyfriend. Chicken took a thick text book and smashed it against the boyfriends face breaking his nose. I asked what he did to him to make him do that. He said nothin, he just didn't like him. What a sorry fuck!"

and:

"He was just a big shit talker about how every comic sucked."

"To bad about Chicken, huh? KNOT!!!"


Now these are harsh things to say about someone. I will probably catch a bunch of shit for even writing this. But I had many conversations with him in the early days when he was first signing his deal... He told me he wanted to be like Chris Farley, and Belushi... he wanted to be crazy, to party hard and for everyone to know it. I specifically remember letting his manager know that- warning him to realize that this was part of who he was.

Suicide is awful. How low do you have to feel to take your own life? I can see killing yourself slowly through lazy choices and poor health- but all at once? We see it as selfish and weak and devoid of courage... but to actually do it... fuck that takes a certain kind of courage and fearlessness that I just don't possess.

We were talking comedy one time and I was explaining how I admired how he could just do all the crazy shit he did on stage and not care... He had an admiration for guys who wrote jokes. We both saw what the other did as hard. He explained how easy it was to just be fearless. I guess it was too easy.

He was the type of comedian that other comics didn't like. Unless you watched him. My buddy Costaki summed it up pretty good long ago after watching him. "He does everything someone like us hates and would never do on stage... but it is just so likable and fun to watch him do it."

He didn't write jokes- wonder if he wrote a note.

Maybe he wasn't trying to kill himself. I had heard that he was starting to get back into the clubs and work out new material. Maybe he was working on a new musical montage tribute to David Caradine and he slipped off the stool that he was humping

This shit is awful. A guy I once considered a friend has hung himself and I am writing jokes about it. What is wrong with me?

Hey if it makes you feel better Chicken thought that all was fair game for making fun of, as long as you did it on the edge. I wrote this entire thing sitting at the computer in a thong with my mother in laws wig overflowing from the sides. He would have loved it.

sorry
t